Pebbles of kindness

In so many societies around the world, everything seems to be disposable. As soon as something starts to break down or wear out—or even when we simply grow tired of it—we throw it out and replace it with an upgrade, something newer or shinier.

We do this with cell phones, clothes, cars and, tragically, even with relationships.

While there may be value in decluttering our lives of material things we no longer need, when it comes to things of eternal importance—our marriages, our families, and our values—a mind-set of replacing the original in favor of the modern can bring profound remorse...

Somehow, as the days multiply and the color of romantic love changes, there are some who slowly stop thinking of each other's happiness and start noticing the little faults. In such an environment, some are enticed by the tragic conclusion that their spouse isn't smart enough, fun enough, or young enough. And somehow they get the idea that this gives them justification to start looking elsewhere.

Brethren, if this comes close to describing you at all, I warn you that you are on a road that leads to broken marriages, broken homes, and broken hearts. I plead with you to stop now, turn around, and come back to the safe path of integrity and loyalty to covenants. And, of course, the same principles apply for our dear sisters......

those who save their marriages understand that this pursuit takes time, patience, and, above all, the blessings of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. It requires you to be kind, envy not, seek not your own, not be easily provoked, think no evil, and rejoice in the truth. In other words, it requires charity, the pure love of Christ.1

All this won't just happen in an instant. Great marriages are built brick by brick, day after day, over a lifetime.....

And that is good news.

Because no matter how flat your relationship may be at the present, if you keep adding pebbles of kindness, compassion, listening, sacrifice, understanding, and selflessness, eventually a mighty pyramid will begin to grow.

And that is good news.

Because no matter how flat your relationship may be at the present, if you keep adding pebbles of kindness, compassion, listening, sacrifice, understanding, and selflessness, eventually a mighty pyramid will begin to grow.

It may be a gradual work, but it doesn't have to be a cheerless one. In fact, at the risk of stating the obvious, divorce rarely happens when the husband and wife are happy.

So be happy!

Those who save their marriages choose happiness. While it's true that some types of chronic depression require specialized treatment, I am fond of this bit of wisdom by Abraham Lincoln: "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." It fits nicely with its scriptural companion: "Seek, and ye shall find."

If we look for imperfections in our spouse or irritations in our marriage, we will certainly find them, because everyone has some. On the other hand, if we look for the good, we will surely find it, because everyone has many good qualities too.

Those who save marriages pull out the weeds and water the flowers. They celebrate the small acts of grace that spark tender feelings of charity. Those who save marriages save future generations.

... remember why you fell in love.

Work each day to make your marriage stronger and happier.

 ...let us do our very best to be numbered among those hallowed and happy souls who save their marriages.

Life is short ..... Regrets can last a long time some will have repercussions that echo through eternity. 

Dieter F. Uchtdorf