Resilience

Nobody seeks out suffering. And yet it is one of life's great ironies that the moments that make us feel weakest often reveal our hidden strengths. We don't really know what we can endure until we are forced to endure it. Yale University professor Steven Southwick believes that "most of us are a lot more resilient than we think." He compares us to a green tree branch—it may not seem as strong as a more mature, rigid limb. But in a strong wind it's the green branch that survives, bending but never breaking. 

That's easy to forget when the winds of life seem to be tossing us about. Resilient people know they can't stop the storm, but they can decide how they react to it. They can take charge of their present and therefore their future. Whatever the challenge may be—a financial crisis, poor health, a conflict in the family or other relationships—they do their best to continue. 

One middle-aged woman learned about her own resilience when her husband died, followed shortly thereafter by serious health problems of her own. The string of difficulties seemed unending, but she just carried on—one hour, one day, one week at a time. It wasn't easy, but it became easier with the passing of time.

And that's the other hidden blessing of suffering: those experiences that seem to be weakening us are actually, in many cases, not only revealing our strength but also increasing it. They require resilience, but at the same time they teach us resilience. They prompt us to develop a more optimistic view by cultivating friendships with positive people. They move us to challenge our negative thoughts and strive for a larger perspective. They can even inspire us to reach out to others in love and kindness, which always helps us feel better. Ultimately, our trials can lead us to trust that God is in His heaven and that He can help us get through the heartache—and come out of it stronger than we ever thought we could be. 

Lloyd Newell

"It is not so much the major events as the small day-to-day decisions that map the course of our living. … Our lives are, in reality, the sum total of our seemingly unimportant decisions and of our capacity to live by those decisions"    Gordon B. Hinckley

Mercifully, our errors can soon be swallowed up by resilient repentance, showing the faith to try again—whether in a task or in a relationship. Such resilience is really an affirmation of our true identities! Spirit sons and daughters of God need not be permanently put down when lifted up by Jesus' Atonement. Christ's infinite Atonement thus applies to our finite failures! Hence, the pleading of that special hymn:

Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,

Prone to leave the God I love;

Here's my heart, O take and seal it;

Seal it for thy courts above.

It also helps in resisting the tugs and pulls of the world if we, though imperfect, know that currently the course of our life is generally acceptable to the Lord. With sufficient dedication, those quiet assurances can come!

Neal A. Maxwell

"Our Heavenly Father did not put us on the earth to fail, but to succeed gloriously!" 

 Richard G. Scott